4 Pros and cons to doing a first look

Hello again! Today I’m excited to talk about a subject that many couples spend months stewing over before finally making up their minds. It seems like it should be simple, but the more it works its way into your head the more it becomes an enormous overblown thing that it really doesn’t need to be. Hopefully this article will help to condense this big knot of mental Christmas lights into a few simple things to consider. After reading this I hope you will be more than a step closer to your decision to have a first look, or to opt for the more traditional route!

So, it's been years now since the idea of the first look hit the wedding scene. It has officially proved itself to be more than a fad and for good reason. It’s romantic, modern and intimate to name a few reasons. Oh, and also the pictures from a first look are precious and beautiful if done right. As photographers, Sarah and I love first looks for a few main reasons.

The Pros.

Goodbye to Nervousness.

First, on a wedding day it can feel like there is a lot of pressure on the bride and groom to keep things running smoothly. Think about this. In a stressful situation who is the one person who makes you feel like you can do anything? I hope you answered your partner! I mean, that’s why you're getting married right? My number one reason I love first looks is that when the bride and groom come together early on a wedding day you can actually feel their tension melt away. Not only the nervousness about seeing each other that was hanging over their heads. But the subconscious feeling of doing this alone vanishes.

Photos done early.

When researching for this article I saw tons of writers saying that couples photos might not be as special to you on the wedding day if you aren’t actually married yet. Well… Fine, that’s fair. However, We aren’t necessarily talking about couples photos. Yes we can do some of those after the first look and we almost always do, but a huge chunk of our couples photos will be done around sunset. Long after the ceremony when the light is right! Now we are talking mainly about family photos and bridal party photos. These photos take a lot of time and when we do them all after the ceremony we often find ourselves trying to squeeze everything in as fast as possible. This is not only stressful for everyone “Stress is the enemy of good wedding vibes” but it cuts into precious couples photos time!

Privacy

If you are anything like me you appreciate your privacy. At my ceremony I felt very on the spot and I was uncomfortable at first. That may sound crazy to you but I bet a ton readers know exactly what I’m talking about. I am glad I had my first look with Sarah because I was able to soak it in in privacy and not during an anxious moment in my life with everyone watching. Social anxiety. Yes, I have it too!

Less wedding day pressure

After your first look you tackle those family, and bridal party shots and then you find that your wedding day schedule is suddenly less full, less rushed and more relaxed. That is a key ingredient to a special, fun and romantic wedding day that you remember fondly. Unfortunately over the past 10+ years we have been wedding photographers, we've seen our share of brides and grooms not enjoying their wedding day. Sweating, sour faced, snippy or even arguing… Of course we can’t stand seeing this on someone's special day. When this happens we do everything we possibly can to help. Especially Sarah. She is a master when it comes to wedding planning and positive vibes. There is one commonality between every one of these weddings. The bride and groom had planned too much into a day to not have a first look. Please don’t take that the wrong way. That does not mean that a first look is something you need to do to have an amazing wedding day. Not at all, what it means is if your not doing a first look make sure you're not planning too much after the ceremony. You will most likely find that you didn’t have time to actually enjoy your wedding and the time with the people you love the most on this special day.

Cocktail hour

Speaking of enjoying time with your loved ones. Soon after the ceremony they will all head to your cocktail hour to mingle, laugh, drink and celebrate together. Tradition dictates that the bride and groom aren’t there. But why not? We love when brides and grooms are present for cocktail hour. They have so much fun. Shake off the remaining wedding day jitters and we get to capture some candid photos of them with the guests. The ceremony is still so fresh in everyone’s minds and they are so ready to hug, squeeze and congratulate you!

There is so much more to say but I could literally be here all day and I told you I would make this simple and condensed! Some people prefer the traditional route. I have huge respect for this. Tradition is deep, meaningful and extremely charming. Especially at a formal event like a wedding day. Here are the cons. The reasons you might not want to have a first look.

The cons

Loss of tradition.

Maybe you are a traditionalist, or maybe you highly respect your Mother or Grandmother's opinion and want to take their advice. When you have a first look you are breaking a cultural tradition of not seeing each other before the ceremony. I won’t harp on that for too long because I know that you knew that before clicking on this blog!

Ceremony photos less expressive

There is a theory amongst photographers that if you do a first look, the emotions might be less present at the ceremony. This is both true and not untrue. I’ll elaborate. If you opt not to do a first look, you might find yourself very emotional at the ceremony in the way of joyful tears and a deeply romantic vibe. If you go for the first look you will likely have a different experience. With most of the tension gone you will find yourself more relaxed and likely be more outwardly happy and excited. You will have less tears in the audience and more smiles and joyful laughs and an excited energy from your partner. It will be just as emotional but it will be a different flavor of energy, which leads to a different experience. Whichever you prefer is the correct choice for you!

You’re having an early Mass

A common thought is that you're having an early Mass and so you will have a jump start on your wedding day events. Awesome, In these scenarios we agree. A first look doesn’t yield much in the way of wedding schedule efficiency. It does still offer the relief of ceremony pressure. However, I’m betting that if you are having a Mass you are a person who respects tradition and are willing to deal with that to uphold in what you believe in. That is awesome and I love and respect that, but what are you doing reading this! You already know what you want. Stop second guessing yourself and go confidently into your dream wedding!

In closing

All things considered, it’s up to you to choose. I know that probably not what you want to hear but what I offer is advice.

If you are not having a first look, please consider not overcrowding your wedding plans. Leave time in the schedule between each event to get something to drink, a snack, or just take a breather. Leave time to have fun and not be stressed!

If you are having a first look, make sure that you leave some time to have couples photos done later in that golden hour light! Have a great time but please remember, you’re getting photos done later. Don’t party too hard, you have to keep that hair and makeup on point!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read. I hope this article helped you on your wedding planning journey.

  Sarah and I are open for bookings in the Southern Ohio and Northern Kentucky area as well as traveling sessions. If you’re interested in possibly booking a session just hop over to the contact page and shoot us an email!

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Thanks for reading!

- Jordan Epperson